There was one point while imitation boogie-boarding in Corpus last week when I was suddenly unsure whether the rhythmic tides were pushing me sand-ward or pulling me out into blue nothingness. It was horizontal vertigo, and suddenly the land lovers seemed much further away than they should be. After a few seconds of noncommon-sensical shark fear, I slid off the board and realize I could still touch.
No such thing happened today at Bull Creek. The creek rushes one way, and one way only, and strongly. Beautiful leaves kept clinging to me as they were swept away, and I sat in the cool water and read Tom Robbins. The following passage answered questions in my heart too slippery to ask properly:
"Consider a certain night in August. Princess Leigh-Cheri was gazing out of her attic window. The moon was full. The moon was so bloated it was about to tip over. Imagine awakening to find the moon flat on its face on the bathroom floor, like the late Elvis Presley, poisoned by banana splits. It was a moon that could still wild passions in a moo cow. A moon that could bring out the devil in a bunny rabbit. A moon that could turn lug nuts into moonstones, turn Little Red Riding Hood into the big bad wolf. For more than an hour, Leigh-Cheri stared into the mandala of the sky. "Does the moon have a purpose?" she inquired of Prince Charming.
Prince Charming pretended that she had asked a silly question. Perhaps she had. The same query put to the Remington SL3 elicited this response:
Albert Camus wrote that the only serious qustion is whether to kill yourself or not.
Tom Robbins wrote that the only serious question is whether time has a beginning and an end.
Camus clearly got up on the wrong side of bed, and Robbins must have forgotten to set the alarm.
There is only one serious question. And that is:
Who knows how to make love stay?
Answer me that and I will tell you whether or not to kill yourself."
--Still Life with Woodpecker
Monday, July 23, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
the body of Christ
Corpus Christi is a strange place, one where there are million dollar mansions on the beach and blocks away from street corners with anywhere between 4 to 7 crackheads chillin. The Catholic influence seems to be stronger here, yet it's the capital of spring break, debauchery, thongs and beer bongs. Have and have-nots. Do and do-nots. The gulf is beautiful to me. I grew up on a muddy river you'd not want to put your feet in, much less swim. Here the sea gulls cry, the waves advance and recede soothingly, the constant seabreeze brings about fro-like hair conditions and my skin tasty salty and sweetly sweaty all the time. The oil refineries and factories stand out in the wide open sunset of watercolors. I like it here. The sand feels right between my toes. I'm going to buy a boogie board next week. And lucky for me, it's my second home for the next month as I will be there every week from Tuesday through Thursday, teaching classes and staying in a kickass hotel right on the beach (boyyyy).
The first week was a comedy of errors--a gross hotel room, an FFA convention overrunning the town, shipping and inventory problems, new classes and students, etc. The drive down is a bitch, and the drive back is bitchier. But I found time to walk the beach some, to get some sun, eat some fresh seafood. I've always wondered who the first guy was that pulled a crab or a lobster out of the ocean and thought to himself, "I bet whatever's in here tastes good. I'm gonna rip it open and eat what I find." I thought about water, how it was here before anything else, and how we're mostly water. The Bible says God created the heavens and the earth, and then light. Apparently water was already there, because "the Spirit was hovering over the waters," an image that has always stuck with me since childhood. I thought about how you can stand and face the ocean, where it blends into the sky itself, a melding of blues and grays, and when you turn back around and face the world your problems don't sound as bad. Not when you turn back around and look into that expanse of power and life. The disciples were fishermen. We're baptized in water. The Catholics have holy water. We all cry and leak water. Just interesting. Water.
Thursday night I decided to reward my hard work with a nice dinner at a nice restaurant. Sure enough, a girl can't get any peace eating alone, and a old dude came over. I mean grandpa-old, bald, wearing a Hawaiian shirt with the top buttons undone to make sure that nice gray chest hair was showing. He was nice enough, and although I didn't really want to, I agree to let him join me and listened to him talk about boring lawyer stuff while I tried to enjoy my pontchartrain. Suddenly looking forward to the solidarity of my drive home, we went outside for a cigarette. I saw another woman walking outside for the same reason, so I jumped on this excuse to include other strangers besides Grandpa and me. She joined us. Then things got weird.
Leeann, who grew up in Corpus Christi and was now returning to live with her mother after a messy divorced, got married (the first time) when she was 14. That's right, 14. She looked to be in her early 40's to me, and claimed to have never drank or partied til she was 39, and her grownup kids didn't like that, so that seemed to have something to do with her moving back as well. She talked a mile a minute and had gold blush on. It nicely complimented the blue eyeshadow and liner. Then Old Boy came out, Leann's latest catch, whose IQ and number of teeth were within the same range, and not in a good way. Choking back laughter I ordered one more beer and asked how they met. In a convenience store. Leeann shrieked (and imagine this with a heavy redneck accent), "I had just rolled outta bed that mornin and we needed some ahce (ice) so I went down to the convenience store, I didn't have no makeup on, no shoes, I don't even think I had a bra on!" Old Boy laughed and said he had no idea how that all happened, and I wondered if that was due to drunkenness or repressing the memory. Leeann's last husband (I'm not sure how many there were) was 12 years younger than her, and had pretty much moved in on their first date and never left. Then two more rednecks came out, friends of Leeann and Old Boy, and I realized I was sitting with 5 people and at least 8 divorces. I felt the red-neckedness and desperation hanging thick in the air and decided it was time to go home.
Til next week, Corpus.
The first week was a comedy of errors--a gross hotel room, an FFA convention overrunning the town, shipping and inventory problems, new classes and students, etc. The drive down is a bitch, and the drive back is bitchier. But I found time to walk the beach some, to get some sun, eat some fresh seafood. I've always wondered who the first guy was that pulled a crab or a lobster out of the ocean and thought to himself, "I bet whatever's in here tastes good. I'm gonna rip it open and eat what I find." I thought about water, how it was here before anything else, and how we're mostly water. The Bible says God created the heavens and the earth, and then light. Apparently water was already there, because "the Spirit was hovering over the waters," an image that has always stuck with me since childhood. I thought about how you can stand and face the ocean, where it blends into the sky itself, a melding of blues and grays, and when you turn back around and face the world your problems don't sound as bad. Not when you turn back around and look into that expanse of power and life. The disciples were fishermen. We're baptized in water. The Catholics have holy water. We all cry and leak water. Just interesting. Water.
Thursday night I decided to reward my hard work with a nice dinner at a nice restaurant. Sure enough, a girl can't get any peace eating alone, and a old dude came over. I mean grandpa-old, bald, wearing a Hawaiian shirt with the top buttons undone to make sure that nice gray chest hair was showing. He was nice enough, and although I didn't really want to, I agree to let him join me and listened to him talk about boring lawyer stuff while I tried to enjoy my pontchartrain. Suddenly looking forward to the solidarity of my drive home, we went outside for a cigarette. I saw another woman walking outside for the same reason, so I jumped on this excuse to include other strangers besides Grandpa and me. She joined us. Then things got weird.
Leeann, who grew up in Corpus Christi and was now returning to live with her mother after a messy divorced, got married (the first time) when she was 14. That's right, 14. She looked to be in her early 40's to me, and claimed to have never drank or partied til she was 39, and her grownup kids didn't like that, so that seemed to have something to do with her moving back as well. She talked a mile a minute and had gold blush on. It nicely complimented the blue eyeshadow and liner. Then Old Boy came out, Leann's latest catch, whose IQ and number of teeth were within the same range, and not in a good way. Choking back laughter I ordered one more beer and asked how they met. In a convenience store. Leeann shrieked (and imagine this with a heavy redneck accent), "I had just rolled outta bed that mornin and we needed some ahce (ice) so I went down to the convenience store, I didn't have no makeup on, no shoes, I don't even think I had a bra on!" Old Boy laughed and said he had no idea how that all happened, and I wondered if that was due to drunkenness or repressing the memory. Leeann's last husband (I'm not sure how many there were) was 12 years younger than her, and had pretty much moved in on their first date and never left. Then two more rednecks came out, friends of Leeann and Old Boy, and I realized I was sitting with 5 people and at least 8 divorces. I felt the red-neckedness and desperation hanging thick in the air and decided it was time to go home.
Til next week, Corpus.
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